By the time I had been married for three months, I knew I would homeschool my children--and we weren't even pregnant yet! (It took my hubby a bit longer to come to the same conclusion, but that's another story.)

I remember attending my first meeting of our church's homeschool moms group when our oldest was just a few months old. I felt a bit out of place, but I nonetheless felt compelled to be there. I mean, I only had 4-5 years before I'd have to know what I was doing! I wanted to know more about the different "styles" of homeschooling, what everyone's favorite curriculum was, etc...

I didn't want to be caught unprepared.

Now, most moms probably won't be attending homeschool groups, or researching curriculum options, when their children are babies, but most of us do want to be prepared.

The problem comes, of course, when homeschooling was not the original plan. I have talked to several moms who are going to homeschool their Kindergartener this year, after having assumed they would always send their child to school.

Their big question is,

"Help! What do I do? Where do I start?"


They want to know the same things I did when my son was a baby, but they feel a far greater sense of urgency.

They need a crash course.


And so, with much humility, and the disclaimer that my only claim to "expertise" is having successfully homeschooled one Kindergartener, I offer my version of that crash course.

First of all, the basics. (I promise, for those who have asked, to talk about specific curriculum recommendations in a forthcoming post):

1. Don't Panic. Seriously...don't do it! Kindergarten is not that complicated, and you're highly unlikely to mess it up. You're the one who taught your child to walk, talk, and use the potty, aren't you? Indeed, you've taught him a lot more than that already. Nobody sprinkled pixie dust over your child's head when he turned five, magically changing him into someone who can only be taught by a "professional" with a teaching certificate. You are the world's foremost expert in your own child, and you are qualified to teach him.

2. Learn the Laws. This is the least fun part of preparing for homeschooling, but it is important. You need to find out what the homeschooling laws are in your state. The Homeschool Legal Defense Association (HSLDA) website has information on the homeschooling laws for each state (and yes, homeschooling is legal in all 50 states). I would also recommend finding out what your state's homeschool advocacy group is, as they may have more detailed information. (For my "local" readers, Wisconsin Parents Association (WPA) is an outstanding resource. I highly recommend their handbook.)

The good news is, many states do not have mandatory attendance laws before the age of 6, 7, or even 8, so you may not actually have to "do" anything in terms of reporting or approving your homeschool with the state--at least, not this year. Be wary of mailings or visits from your local school district, suggesting that you need to submit your child to developmental screening, give personal information about your child for a school "census", or allow a school official to review your curriculum. Only do these things if they are actually required by law.

3. Talk to Someone Who's "Been There". Find the most experienced mom you know, who has homeschooled the most kids, whose children you like, and start there. Most likely, you are not the only homeschooling parent in your area, and local support and encouragement is best if it is available.

If you don't know of any other local homeschooling families, try asking your state's advocacy group about any area support groups or co-ops. You can also check the state-by-state listings at homeschoolclassifieds.com .

There are many, many, online homeschooling communities, of course, and these can be immensely helpful. They can also be a time drain, though, and time spent sitting at the computer is time usually not spent with your kids (just ask any blogger)...so be judicious, and set your timer.


4. Don't "Do School"...Do Life. We live in an ultra-compartmentalized world, that separates home from work from academia. Judging by the way the typical school is structured, you'd think that people of different ages couldn't even have a conversation with each other! This is such an artificial way of thinking, but it's a mindset that most of us have been raised with, and we have to work very hard to shake it if we're going to raise our children differently.

Work is life...life is family...family is school. They are all interconnected.

So take your kids with your to the grocery store. Talk about the different kinds of fruits and vegetables you see. Talk about making wise food choices. Talk about menus, shopping lists, budgets, and sales.

Teach your children how to wash dishes, fold and put away clothes, and scrub the toilet. Every Kindergartener can be taught to help with cooking and meal preparations. Their future spouses will thank you some day.

And talk to your kids...when you sit down, when you walk along the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. (Deuteronomy 11:19). Young children learn so much from ordinary conversation! They do not need to sit down at a desk (or in a circle for that matter) and listen to a teacher talk for learning to occur.

5. Be Wise About "Socialization". If you've recently decided that you are going to homeschool your Kindergartener--even if it's just for one year--you will most likely hear concerns from friends and family about so-called "socialization". While the definition of this hot-button word changes from person to person (see this post), when it comes to your five or six year old, most people are probably worried that your child will be lonely, awkward, or have no friends.

For some parents, these conversations can become quiet frustrating, because the very reason they have chosen not to send their children to Kindergarten is because they are timid, shy, and have a hard time making friends--or, on the other end of things, they may be easily overstimulated, have a hard time sitting still, and have difficulty interacting with peers in a way that is at all "friendly" or constructive. Many folks see the only solution to shyness or obnoxious behavior in large group settings is to expose the young child to more large group settings.

Homeschooling families think differently. We believe that a gentler approach is in order. So we take our children on play dates at friends' houses or at parks. We play in groups of 4, 8, or 10 children, all accompanied by involved parents, rather than groups of 20 or 30, with one teacher and maybe a teacher's aide to play "referee". Our children can cultivate friendships with children and adults of all ages, in various settings, rather than spending the vast majority of their time in the same classroom with the same set of peers. They can observe their parents interacting and conversing with other adults, and they can have their own conversations guided by loving parents, who want to see their children treat other people with kindness, politeness and respect.

6. Remember the 80/20 Principle. Last but not least, whenever you feel overwhelmed, remember that about 20% of what you do makes an 80% difference, and about 80% of what you do makes only a 20% difference. Concentrate on the 20% that is the most important.

I am still firmly convinced that most children would be better of if they did nothing but read the Bible and play outside all day than they would in an institutional school setting...especially when they are young. Of course, we do so much more than this every day, but hear my point:

Our primary job as Christian parents is to bring our little ones up in the nurture and admonition of the LORD. (Ephesians 6:4) Contrary to popular opinion, this job cannot be handed off to a Sunday School teacher or Youth Pastor, nor is it over once a child makes a profession of faith. It is a constant, relentless job, where we will face opposition at every turn.

Think about how hard it is for you, as a mature adult, to grow spiritually. How much harder it is for our little ones! But, that's why God gave them to us--why He places them in families! He does it in order that we might pass on the living truth of our Christian faith from generation to generation. This kind of spiritual instruction is virtually impossible to accomplish when our children are away from us for most of each day, most of each week. When we remember this, questions about curriculum, socialization, and logistics can be seen in a whole new light...and it gives us a renewed confidence in what we are doing, why we are doing it, and Who we are doing it for.

So, there you have it, my top six tips for getting started with Kindergarten homeschooling. (We'll talk about "what to teach" and choosing curriculum shortly.)

What do you think? I'd love to hear your thoughts! Is this helpful? What suggestions would you add?